*Barefoot Contessa* star Ina Garten revealed that before marrying her husband of 56 years, Jeffrey Garten, she had to confront her mother’s strong disapproval.
Reflecting on a pivotal moment in 1968, Garten shared in a recent interview with Hoda Kotb on *Today* that her parents visited to voice their concerns just before Jeffrey’s proposal.
“My mother walked into the room and said, ‘I don’t think you should get married,’” Garten recalled. “She thought she knew what was best for me,” she added.
Ina Garten, star of *Barefoot Contessa*, recently opened up about a pivotal moment in her life when she stood up to her mother for the first time—a decision that shaped her future with her husband of 56 years, Jeffrey Garten.
In a candid interview with Hoda Kotb on *Today*, Garten recalled the moment in 1968 when her parents visited her just before Jeffrey’s impending proposal. Her mother, in a blunt and disapproving tone, told her, “I don’t think you should get married.”
Garten admitted that her mother thought she knew what was best for her and had always been a dominant figure in her life.
For Garten, this moment became a turning point. She responded with what she described as “the first time I ever stood up to my mother.” Gathering all the courage she could muster, she said, “‘I’m very sorry,’ and I said this with as much love as I could—‘This is the first time I’m ever going to say this to you.
I don’t care what you think, I’m marrying Jeffrey.’” While it took tremendous bravery, Garten’s mother did not take it well. Instead of responding, she left the room in silence, visibly upset by her daughter’s decision.
In contrast, Garten’s father was more supportive of her choice. He expressed his approval of her relationship with Jeffrey, telling her that marrying him was “the smartest thing you’ve ever done.”
Despite the initial challenges, Garten and Jeffrey went on to marry while she was still a student at Syracuse University and he was preparing for his time in the army.
However, their relationship faced its own rough patches, particularly when Garten opened her Barefoot Contessa store. She previously shared with *People* that Jeffrey had expected a more traditional dynamic in their marriage, including having dinner prepared for him.
The pressures from her career and the strain of not conforming to those expectations caused the couple to briefly separate. Yet, this separation ultimately strengthened their relationship, and they reunited with a deeper understanding and commitment to each other.
Garten reflected on these personal struggles, along with her complex relationship with her parents, in her memoir *Be Ready When the Luck Happens*, released just last month.
In the memoir, she delves into the emotional and, at times, physical abuse she endured growing up, shedding light on the difficult relationship with her parents, both of whom have since passed away. Despite the hardships, Garten’s marriage to Jeffrey has endured, and their long-lasting bond remains a testament to their resilience and love.
Ina Garten opened up about her painful childhood experiences during a recent interview, recalling instances of both emotional and physical abuse at the hands of her father. She shared a particularly hurtful memory when her father, angry for reasons she couldn’t recall, told her, “Nobody will ever love you.” Reflecting on this, Garten finds solace in the irony of her life today. “What I love is walking up Madison Avenue and someone leans in and says, ‘I love you.’ It’s this great cosmic joke to me. It’s like, ‘Oops, I guess he was wrong.’”
Garten also spoke about one of her father’s physically abusive episodes, recounting how she feared for her life. “I thought he was going to kill me,” she revealed, underscoring the intensity of the trauma she endured. Her relationship with her mother was equally difficult, marked by neglect.
Garten explained that she later came to the realization that her mother may have been on the autism spectrum, which could have contributed to her inability to emotionally connect with her. “But as a child, it was very hard to have a mother you couldn’t have a relationship with,” she added, acknowledging the profound impact it had on her growing up.
Describing her childhood as one filled with restrictions, Garten said, “I wasn’t allowed to think for myself, I wasn’t allowed to do things. My ideas were thwarted, and I was always told whatever I wanted to do wasn’t a good idea—so I wasn’t myself. I was scared and I was alone.” These formative experiences left her feeling isolated and stifled.
However, Garten credits her marriage to Jeffrey as her safe haven. “When I met Jeffrey, he was just the opposite,” she said. “The life that I want to live, [meeting Jeffrey is] where it started.” Jeffrey’s support and unconditional love have been the foundation of their relationship, helping Garten find the freedom and confidence she had been denied as a child.
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